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I wish I hadn't read some of the doctor blogs online today where they speak very honestly about their houseman year, that if anyone ever told them that life was going to be like that they might have considered doing something else, if only someone had told them. But then again, when you're so set on what is it you want to do or become, it's quite difficult to be swayed easily, and even if you experience the slightest tinge of self doubt, it will instantly be replaced with denial topped off with a "It can't be THAT bad can it?"
But honestly, Grey's Anatomy preaches it, SCRUBS portrays it, and the blogs I read so far all say it's true, you will pull 100 hour weeks. You will be stretched beyond your human limit, you will be tired and you will constantly ask yourself "WHY?", you will have little time for much else, but when you do, you are supposed to remember that you have a life beyond hospital doors.

So what am I to believe?
I suppose it is all true, and work will be all consuming.
And it's much more difficult now, because I was in the work force for almost 2 years and I loved my weekends (although it was 5.5days!) and my dinners after work and the great equilibrium between work and play. Yes, it is often skewed, but that's life isn't it, constantly trying to find your centre and balance things out.
And it's difficult because I know I can head out now and make something of myself now, and in a completely different industry even, if I wanted to. I opened up my options in that year and a half. I'm taking a huge risk, and not only that, a risk with a massive debt. It's either the biggest mistake of my life or the smartest thing I'll ever do for myself.

Well, I'll find out soon enough.
I'm going to stop at 3.
3 applications, that's quite enough.
If this doesn't work out, I'll start making something out of myself.
At least I can say with all honesty,
I gave it my all.