" I'm independent..."
I'm so sick of people saying "I'm independent" and I admit, even I myself have been guilty of it. Think I'm so full of it, having been away for many many years, living on my own in a foreign land. Truth is, I'm just scared and need company. Ya, I can shop on my own, eat on my own, sit at a cafe on my own, those are easy things people can do on their own. But am I truly independent? Truly?
No.
I'm just a fraud. Meek and scared. Too scared to pack up and leave Singapore to work, to scared to go travelling on my own, too scared to come out of my shell. I might seem really forward and gregarious to friends, but I have times where I'm just crippled, and can only manage a polite smile, nods and grunts for answers.
But there ARE those who are truly independent.
Case in point would be D and his friend G.
G called me up for a chat recently because I was feeling rubbish and insecure as hell. G was telling me that this girl he went out with for ages used to say that she felt like he did'nt need her. And I understood what this dear boy was saying.
To date a frighteningly indenpendent person, one has to be on par with him/her in terms of independence and have built up a great deal of self confidence and maturity, of which I have none. Dating a TRUELY independent person means that you, as lovely and great as you might be, will only ever be a welcomed addition into his/her life, not a necessity. The truly independent person has spent a great deal of time building up his/her little comfortable one man island that thay have grown quite accoustomed to the 'alone time' garden of eden.
We are all searching for love and companionship, it's the law of the jungle. Animals find a mate to proliferate, and so do we. Only we've got a higher congnitive function and so are capable of emotions and this thing called love.
I wish I were truly independent.
I want my garden of eden.
I'm so sick of people saying "I'm independent" and I admit, even I myself have been guilty of it. Think I'm so full of it, having been away for many many years, living on my own in a foreign land. Truth is, I'm just scared and need company. Ya, I can shop on my own, eat on my own, sit at a cafe on my own, those are easy things people can do on their own. But am I truly independent? Truly?
No.
I'm just a fraud. Meek and scared. Too scared to pack up and leave Singapore to work, to scared to go travelling on my own, too scared to come out of my shell. I might seem really forward and gregarious to friends, but I have times where I'm just crippled, and can only manage a polite smile, nods and grunts for answers.
But there ARE those who are truly independent.
Case in point would be D and his friend G.
G called me up for a chat recently because I was feeling rubbish and insecure as hell. G was telling me that this girl he went out with for ages used to say that she felt like he did'nt need her. And I understood what this dear boy was saying.
To date a frighteningly indenpendent person, one has to be on par with him/her in terms of independence and have built up a great deal of self confidence and maturity, of which I have none. Dating a TRUELY independent person means that you, as lovely and great as you might be, will only ever be a welcomed addition into his/her life, not a necessity. The truly independent person has spent a great deal of time building up his/her little comfortable one man island that thay have grown quite accoustomed to the 'alone time' garden of eden.
We are all searching for love and companionship, it's the law of the jungle. Animals find a mate to proliferate, and so do we. Only we've got a higher congnitive function and so are capable of emotions and this thing called love.
I wish I were truly independent.
I want my garden of eden.