The Gnomes Made Me Do It!

Once again, those old childhood feelings and memories have come back to haunt. I've long given up on having best friends having been hurt by placing too much emotions and trust in them, thinking they would withstand the test of time. Friendship to me has always been a very transitional thing, never long term, always fleeting and brief. It is not easy to sustain a long term friendship and it takes work from both parties, one can't just sit back and expect the other to call, write, e-mail, sms, provide updates and not expect you to give him/her anything in return. I guess I became very jaded after old secondary school friends drifted, and the 2 years in England where I made friends with some wonderful girls only to have to say our painful goodbyes and never see each other again. Australia was refreshing, keeping close those who are still in Singapore (though not for long! :P) and making effort to keep in touch with our favourite Malaysian girl. I've always been picky with who I like to hang out with on a regular basis, and when I do find those few, I give it my best, but I know that there's that 20% ,that by conditioning, I have held back so that in case the shit hits the fan, I would be able to shrug it off, pat them on the back and say 'Thanks for the memories'. I'm not sure if this is the best way, but it's the only way I know, but I suppose it will change over time. With everyone coming and going, starting lives elsewhere, experiencing new things and significant milestones without you, it's hard to be everybody's best friend. I am just glad that we still meet for coffee, even if it's only for those 2 short hours, and during that time, its as if nothing else matters.

Posted by sideshowjo on Wednesday, February 01, 2006 at 12:37 pm | Permalink